Monday, May 23, 2005

How Did I Get Here???? Was That Your Question??

Holy Shit . . how hard is this? It's simple math people.

I have a friend. She's a wonderful friend, though sometimes a little over involved in my life (to be read as OVERBEARING) and a little too preachy for my liking lately. She also seems to have difficulty doing simple math. . . and since you can't yell at your friends (unless they're really wonderful friends - Byrdie!), I'm going to yell here.

This is how I got here (oh, and for those who don't know, here is in about $10,000 of credit card debt):

I was doing so wonderfully. Had finished graduate school, had started my own business, was raking in the dough. I had even stored over $6,000.00 in savings after only 4 months of working. It was great.

And then . . .

Car wreck #1:

2 days before Christmas. Stephen and I are on the way to his parents house to give his mother the damn out amazing floral arrangement and gorgeous urn that I put all together (Thanks, Pier 1 for the materials). We are stopped at a red light, in the turning lane to turn left. Suddenly - Mrs. Housewife decides she can't f---ing wait 30 more seconds to drive the (I KID YOU NOT) block and half to her house and guns it out of the Kroger parking lot slap ass into us. T-boned my door. Wow - PAIN!

Broken head of the femur (leg bone, area of the hip joint) severely damaged ligaments and muscles. Not to mention the pain from other minor injuries. TALK of a hip replacement. I'm 24 for Gods sake! Crutches for 6 weeks, and I'm STILL supposed to be on a cane now.

I couldn't work for 3 weeks, and then, when I could, it was such a hassle and there was so much pain, I could only work part time for 2 weeks. So basically a month without work.

Wreck #2:

I'm FINALLY starting to feel better. I've been working full time for a week and a half. Thinking woo hoo, my savings are now mostly depleted, but I still have some money in there and I'm starting to make more! Yippee! Not to mention, I've met a wonderful, terrific, handsome man.

Leaving his apartment to travel back to my house to ready myself for work (get your heads out of the gutters kids, it wasn't that kind of night). For what is probably one of the few times in my life, I'm actually paying attention to the road. My hands are at 10 and 2, the radio is NOT obscenely loud with alternative music, I am not (miracle of miracles) on the cell phone. I am even actively scanning the lanes. Traveling a modest 65 mph on the highway. This particular highway has 5 lanes. 2 East bound, 1 turning lane for the country roads and 2 West bound. I'm East bound in the lane closest to the turning lane because I was JUST then passing an idiot doing 50.

The rest is from police reports from other individuals and what VERY little I remember seeing in that flash. Small black car in the turning lane. Witnesses report that this person had been traveling in the turning lane (can you say ILLEGAL) for 5 miles. I swear to God, he looks up at me and then cuts the wheel directly into me. The policemen in my hospital room later that day tell me that he was trying to commit suicide and waiting for the biggest vehicle to come along. I guess a Toyota Sequoia fit the bill.

We slammed head on at 65 mph. The police tell me that there was nothing I could have done. They said there weren't even skids on the road from any of us involved because it happened too fast. We had NO time to react. This guy was a real psycho sicko. The impact forced my driver's side into oncoming traffic, where the gentleman who was behind me had NO time to stop either and slammed into me again directly into the driver's side door.

I can not even explain to you what the vehicle - my pride and joy, my graduation present to myself - looked like. I can tell you this. One of my best friends from college happened to drive by the accident that morning. She tells me that she didn't stop because "it looked like a Jeep Liberty, it was just so small". Head on collisions at 65 mph (each person) will do that. My vehicle was reduced to less than half it's size from the wreck. The man attempting to commit suicide - well, he succeeded. He died on impact. (Don't go there, I'm still having nightmares.)

So . . . another month without work. And then part time work because of the injuries. But, on a bright note - My pride and joy saved my life. I immediately purchased a brand new 2005 Toyota Sequoia as soon as I could drive again.

2 months without any income . . . about a month and a half with half income. Yet, the bills were not only the same, they were plus some. So here's the math:

From Dec to mid April I made only (roughly) $8,000.00. Keep in mind, I'm used to taking home more than $5,000.00 per month. That was for an entire 4 month period!

So let's do this:

minus 800.00 (house payment) * 4
equals 4800.00

minus 900.00 (car payment) * 4
equals 1200.00

minus 400.00 (gasoline - I travel A LOT for work) * 2 (months I actually got to work)
equals 400.00

minus 500.00 (groceries and prescriptions) * 4
equals -1600.00

minus 500.00 (utilities, phone/fax, internet, satellite) * 4
equals -3600.00

minus 400.00 (monthly IRA contribution) + 275.56 (monthly independent health insurance premium) + 25.00 (monthly dental insurance premium)
equals 700.56 * 4
equals -4402.24

minus 1500.00 quarterly tax estimate for self employed
equals -5902.24

and the list continues and continues . . .think about everything else that pops up suddenly - - like the end of the year taxes and social security for last year, which I had to pay in March -- which equalled about another 2,000.00 on top of the much higher quarterly I was already paying (being self employed sucks sometimes). Or the $425 certification renewal I had to pay to keep my license current, oh and the $100 licensure fee, also to keep my license current so I could continue practicing. Oh and the malpractice insurance and oil changes since I drive about 4000 miles a month and my student loan payments and 1000 other different piddly ass things that come up in a given month (including my Termite certificate renewal - hit for 2 yrs - $375).

I know that some of those things I could live without - I didn't have to get that expensive a car . . . but at the time, I was making MORE than enough to pay for it -- and knew I was only going to make more.

So, THAT, is how I got here. That is why I have so much debt accumulated now. Because I had NO income coming in, but the same amount of bills. Because you can't just STOP the world because you aren't working. Nextel, Conway Corporation, Southwestern Bell, Arkla, USBanks, The Department of Education, Arkansas Blue Cross/Blue Shield, and the list goes on - - THEY DON'T CARE that you have no money coming in. They still want their money going out.

So don't JUDGE me because I have some credit card debt for the first time in a long time . . .. it wasn't my fault . . . but I'm paying it off. Little by little. As I get on my feet. As I get off my cane. As I realize that eventually I WILL be cleared by the doctor and maybe the insurance companies will reimburse me for the time I missed through no fault of my own. As I stop being angry at the world because this happened to me. Twice.


The Delawarean said...

My god girl, you have been through some SHIT!

My heart goes out to you. I mean damn.

And does that say $900/month car payment? I can't even begin to imagine that...

duckie said...

wow! that really sucks! i can't believe it happened to you twice! I guess you can just feel lucky to be alive and go from there. I wish you luck.

sqg said...

Yeah girl, that really does suck.

Hang tough though and keep plugging away. That's all any of us can do.

And please try not to let it happen a 3rd time!! :o

birdie said...

i had this giant comment and then BLOGGER DELETED IT.
but oh well.
gist was--
i feel your pain. i took a 15,000 dollar paycut 9 months ago. I've still got the same bills from 9 months ago. But hell, I've got to have a car to get to work. So what the hell am I gonna do?
Besides, I know who you're talking about. And we know she's the LAST ONE that needs to talk smack. She can pay her bills now because she lives off of MOM AND DAD.

Bozo's Monkey said...

Guess I am lucky that the accident I was in on the last week of Feb was not as bad as yours, and her insurance is paying for everything, include my doctor visit and pay me for the time I had to miss the work result from the accident.

meghansdiscontent said...

Everyone - Thank you all so much for your concern, truly. I promise you that I am doing great.

Delaware - Umm. . . yes, $900 car payment. Shame on me. But I decided since I spend more time in my vehicle than I do in my own house, by God, I was going to have something that was luxurious and that I loved.

Sqg - Believe it or not, a few weeks ago . . it happened again. I was rear ended during a traffic jam. NO DAMAGE though, thank God. Just made me feel better because things tend to come in threes for me - third time was actually a charm - I needed the relief.

Birdie - Umm, yes, that was the friend. And you're right - she has NO bills because her job GAVE her a vehicle and she lives with her parents.

Dylan - We're still working with the insurance companies. The insurance company from the first wreck was trying to dick me over - so the lawyers are now involved. The second wreck, well, the guy had NO insurance. But my insurance company called two weeks ago and we're working on a settlement. They agree that I shouldn't have to suffer for someone else's idiocy.