Saturday, December 10, 2005

If You Don't Hear From Me . . . .

Assume I have a new residence.
Probably a "pound you in the ass" prison.

Most likely, because I have murdered at least 4 members of my immediate and extended family.

My mother's going to bite the dust first.
Yep, she's the one I want to see gone the worst.
This is my fault, and I know it, but it doesn't change the homicidal urge.
We're the same person.
Yep, from the sarcasm to the flirting to the wit to the voice and laugh - we're the same person.

And if you ever questioned why your friends are your friends - it's because they're not you.
They are ENOUGH like you that you get along and have common interests.
But so different from you that you can have conversations and questions and good times.

But mom's too much like me.
Or I'm too much like her.
And if I could have pulled it off quietly, I would have slipped 4 of these Hydrocodone pills into her Diet Pepsi an hour ago.

Oh, wait, I'm completely off topic.
I was writing this to assure you all that I am well and good.
Recovering nicely, despite set-backs I caused MYSELF to have.
Thank you for all your well wishing and worrying.
It's strange to think about how our lives have intersected.
It's even stranger when I think about the fact that each of you are people I would worry about if you were in the same situation.
Odd what this blogging has morphed into.
It's like a family.
But one you don't want to kill.
Because they don't invade your space.
And force feed you sweets.
And make you stay in a bed.
And carry you - YES, carry you - to the bathroom.
I DIDN'T have LEG surgery, crazies!!!!!!!
My legs WORK!

Ranting getting a bit out of control.
Original post has turned to a stream of consciousness.
Obviously the latest pain pill has kicked in.
Say goodnight, Gracie.


Kate said...

Glad you're feeling better. I wish I had some butterscotch pie. Can you post the recipe. ;-)

trueborn said...

Well, when I went under the knife a couple of years ago the only thing that kept me sane was an extremely long video game on my PS2 and as much solitude as possible, sadly the solitude was not in the offing, so I can understand.
The thing is, they really don't knw what to do..
Just tell them, give them something to do and they'll make themselves scarce. All 'cept mom that is, if your mother is anything like my mother.

muffin said...

Glad it all went well and your alive and kicking, babe!

ha ha ha. Being in confined spaces with your family for extented periods of time can be intolerable. I imagine it is even worse when you are sick and helpless. You poor thing! xox.

Steph said...

Awww poor you. Does it help that they mean well??? No? Ok, well just pretend to sleep alot and pray they go away. Wishing you well for a speedy recovery.

qwer said...


Send them Lax-o-cake...hmmm...that's my solution to everything at the moment.

Hope you're okay and remember...WE MISS YOUR LISTS!!! ;o)

Take care!

And jesus Steph, ANOTHER profile pic already?! Not that I'm complaining...I like that one as much as the others ;o)

meghansdiscontent said...

Kate - Thanks, doll. Yep, I sure can post that recipe. I will do it ASAP just for you! :)

True - I've told them. Over and over and over. No scarcity in sight. In fact, what I did get was a 30 minute lecture about how rude it was to ignore the people helping me (helping me what?? take pills and sleep??) to answer emails and blog. Argh!

Muffin - Darlin, are you telling me that that whole time you were on death's door you were alone??? Girlie, we thought you were going to die! I tried to send Adam over with soup! Enough about me . .. how the heck are you feeling??? Oh, and I'm jealous beyond all reason that you were alone. Alone? All alone?? Lucky duck.

Steph - I tried the pretending sleep thing so I could answer emails . . . but they heard the clacking of the laptop keys. Sadness. Thanks for the well wishings though!!

TFS - I could not/would not do that to my dear sweet family . . . however, at this point I would willingly pay 1 million dollars to send them all to some far corner of the Earth. As for lists - that is no longer my responsibility!! Steph took a dare! The next list/questionnaire is all for her. My responsibility is to write about an emotionally touching moment. And I am failing miserably, because everything I write turns into some 24 page erotica novellette. Damnit.

And leave Steph's feet alone! We all enjoy the change. By the way, Steph - babe, was your shoe choice this go 'round a reaction to the kick-ass attitude you wanted to have towards ole' Brad of the Exploding Cheeks???

qwer said...

I would be more than happy to give you an honest unbias appraisal of your novellette ;o)

meghansdiscontent said...

TFS - hmm . . . mayhap I should post it in stages??

Problem - I changed the names of places and certain people to protect certain privacies, but otherwise it's all true . . and having THAT much about me out there . . is a bit scary.

qwer said...

Heh, again...only kidding :o)

Steph said...

Megs, you can read my mind! The black boots are indeed gonad kickers. Would you believe i just found a pair of stilleto boots made from combat fatigues?? I got them in honour of Chairborn hehehehe!!

beachgirl said...

GURRRL!!! I know exactly where you are coming from.... How quickly I forget I almost lost my mother over the summer and promised Jesus that I would never say another unkind word to her if he let her live... Well he let her live and within 3 days of her recovery when she said "when was the last time you washed your hair?" I was ready to make another deal with Jesus- Please Lord don't let me kill her whil she sleeps...

But I love her with everything that I am and I would be LOST without her... SO I know EXACTLY where you are coming from...

I'm with Kate... post the butterscotch pie recipe...

Chairborne Stranger said...

Well, I'm so glad you're doing better and everything turned out well and a quick recovery.

Chairborne Stranger said...

Steph, -that's too funny, by the way-thanks for keeping me engaged in nice boots-LOL--although that last picture was smashing! Glad to see you're willing to do your part for freedom LOL!