Tattoo. Nuff said.
One of my best friends in the entire world moved to Fayetteville two years ago.
She didn’t want to go, she loved her job in Hot Springs, but her husband was transferred and it was move or get a divorce.
She chose move.
She got a job at the hospital there and worked her way up.
She’s now head of the therapy department.
I got a phone call on Monday:
Jane: How do you feel about moving?
Me: In general? I would rather die than move again.
Me: Probably not. Why, what’s up?
Jane: I have this Speech Path working for us that I can’t stand. She does NOTHING.
She lies to Bill all the time about things saying she’s “working” but since Bill’s a Physical Therapist he has no idea how long it takes us to do things. She told him Monday that she was down in Radio doing a MBSS for 3 hours.
Me: THREE HOURS!?!?!? At the longest, and that’s with a crap radiologist and an uncooperative patient, an MBSS takes an hour.
Jane: Exactly. I personally think she went shopping, but who knows. Anyway, she’s leaving in 2 months on maternity leave and I think I’m going to try and make it permanent. If she’s out, I need a new therapist almost immediately. You game?
Me: Hahaha! You know how I feel about salary jobs! They’re horrid. Too many taxes, too much paperwork, too many requirements, not enough patients.
Jane: It’s not salary. We’d pay you hourly AND you’re guaranteed 40 hours a week.
Me: Hmm . . I know a hospital’s idea of hourly pay. St. Vincent’s is paying $40. I can’t live on that. Too many medical bills in combination with everything else.
Jane: We’re not St. Vincent’s. You’re doing hourly on contract now, right? What if I told you we’d give you $10 an hour more than you’re making now. No travel, in a hospital, rarely ANY pediatric cases, you’d be back in the Radio lab and I know you miss it. Plus, you’d get benefits and could drop your shitty insurance. And you get a raise in three months.
Me: I don’t know.
Jane: Did I mention I had 9 hours of overtime last week, and you get time and a half for that.
Me: I would have to dissolve my business.
Jane: We pay for your continuing education, we pay your licensure fees, we pay your liability insurance, we pay your travel and conference fees and we give you a hella good yearly budget for therapy materials.
Me: I would have to move to Fayetteville.
Jane: We pay your relocation costs. We would help you find a house. We will help you sell your house.
Me: IF I moved, I would just rent the house to my brother and his roommates. My house is bigger than their rent house anyway.
Jane: So you’re thinking about it.
Me: I’m thinking.
Jane: Oh and for every 8 hours you work, you earn 1 hour of vacation time. Which starts immediately. So the first week, you would have earned 5 paid vacation hours. Do you even get paid when you’re off now?
Me: You know I don’t.
Jane: See how good this would be????
Me: Just fax me the benefit info and the sliding pay scale.
Jane: Done and DONE. This is so exciting!! I miss you so much!! Especially once football season is over and we NEVER see each other.
Hmm. . . definitely thinking about it. Downsides - MOVING, buying a new house, dissolving my business, leaving my friends, moving another 2.5 hours from my family. Upsides - more money, better insurance, hospital environment again, being in the same town as a large group of my friends who moved after college, being in the same town as my favorite NCAA football team, moving another 2.5 hours from my family. Oh oh oh, and another upside - There's a very SLIM chance of me ever needing to punch anyone . . a hospital's a little more secure than a daycare in the (pardon this) ghetto.