I have to express my gratitude for the Arkansas State Troopers.
Their leniency should be commended.
Dinner with friends.
I readily admit I have a HEAVY foot.
I find it very, VERY hard to stay at the speed limit.
Last night, I was too busy singing to pay attention to the speedometer.
70 MPH zone.
"Ma'am, are you aware of the speed limit in this particular area?"
"Yes, sir. 70 MPH."
"Are you aware of your own speed?"
Flirtatious giggle - I'm NOT above debasing myself to avoid a ticket: "I'm assuming above 70?"
He actually laughs! Thank God.
"Yes, ma'am. Well above 70. You were traveling 92 MPH when I clocked you."
Plus reckless driving.
Plus anything else he feels like tagging on.
I'm looking at AT LEAST $300, probably more.
I can't afford that!!
Please, please, no.
"I had no idea I was going so fast. I am so sorry officer."
"May I see your license and registration?"
I dig them out of the console and think, Hell, I'm getting the ticket.
Of course I'm getting the ticket.
I was 20 + miles over the speed limit.
"Ms. SoandSo, you are aware that traveling at that high a speed is extremely dangerous. Particularly in an SUV. It increases the chances of turn over. With the winds this high tonight, it is even more likely."
"Yes, sir. I do apologize. I had no idea I was going that fast. I'm normally a very consciencious driver."
Lies, all lies. I am a VERY good driver, but a very fast driver.
"I will be right back."
He goes back to his cruiser and I sit there and feel my stomach tie into even harder knots.
Shit, shit, shit.
"Ms. SoandSo, I'm going to let you off with a warning. It would be a shame to see you start off the New Year with an infraction of this kind. I need you to promise me that this will not happen again."
Mentally: Oh holy hell, if you're REALLY letting me off with a warning, not only will I PRO-mise to not do it again (lies), I will send gifts to your first born.
"No, sir. I promise this will not happen again. I will set my cruise control to ensure it."
He smiles at me, hands back my license and registration - along with the warning ticket, and lets me go.
Do I learn my lesson?
Less than 12 hours later:
45 MPH zone.
Shit, shit, shit.
I could type up the whole spiel again, but I doubt you want to read it.
Just let it be known that flirtation or the gods were with me for another day.
58 in a 45.
Not even a warning ticket.
He checks my license and registration, talks to me about the importance of awareness and then says:
"I'm giving you a late Christmas present. I'm letting you go, but be more aware of your speed, Miss. I doubt anyone else will be this lenient."
Ha ha - if only you knew.
Thank you, Arkansas State Troopers.
I DID attempt to watch my speed a little more this morning.
I made certain to stay under 80.
I'm wondering, with this kind of luck, if I should go buy a lottery ticket.