Thursday, July 12, 2007

Is There a Lost and Found for These Things?

*Sigh* I don't know where my willpower has gone, but it has vanished like a virgin on prom night . . . or an underage boy in the vicinity of Michael Jackson's house.

Just a few short months ago, I was able to resist most any temptation of appetite. Keep your sugary sweets and your tempting treats! I want none of them! I need only a bottle of water and a trek around the track or a lap or 14 in the pool.

But recently, and unexpectedly, my willpower jumped ship. I think I saw it waving to me from the distant shore. It seemed to say, "Good luck on your own, sucker! You didn't appreciate me while I was around so I'm going in search of someone who will. Perhaps an anorexic or Nicole Ritchie." Whoops, I forgot the two were mutually exclusive. Anywho . .

My willpower is gone and I'm not liking it one bit. Now I have to rely on myself to deny my sweet tooth. And while I'm doing alright for now, I know the next temptation is around the corner and I believe that short of wiring my jaw together and handcuffing my wrists behind my back - - there's no way I can continue to say "No."

Nancy Reagan would be so dismayed. Wait, umm, is she still with us? I'm drifting off topic. Again.

I need a Lost and Found to search through and relocate my willpower. Or someone else's. It doesn't even have to be as strong as my old one. Any strength will do. As long as I'm not on this ship alone sailing towards Temptation Island.

*Urgh* I'm weak and weary. Someone throw me a Life Vest.


TC said...

If you happen to find it cloned itself or something, wanna let me know? I could use one.

Jon said...

Yeah, Nancy Reagan is still with us. "Just Say No" is not.

meghansdiscontent said...

TC - I'll be sure and shoot you an email, ASAP.

Jon - Don't say that. :( "Just Say No" is a part of our American Heritage. It will always live on.

Burg said...

Two words: Sugar-free..

meghansdiscontent said...

Burg - Oh, if only that would do it for me! My body is insulin resistant along with a host of other problems and I constantly crave sugars and carbs.