Friday, July 06, 2007

Never Around When You Need One

So, I had an interesting/scary/pissed me off experience this morning.

I take Hwy 64 from my house into Menifee (a town of 450 with the cattle and the chickens) simply because it's more convenient and fewer miles from my house. But, at Menifee, I merge onto I-40 to travel the rest of the way to work. A) Because I get tired of driving 55 MPH and B) Because there are fewer police just aching to show their superiority.

It is now obvious to me that I should have stayed on Hwy 64 this morning.

I knew something was amiss the moment I got onto I-40. This Chevy, extended cab, Z-71 immediately started bearing down on me while swerving erratically from lane to lane. I noticed other drivers were giving him a wide berth, so I attempted to do the same - to no avail.

He and his cohort would pull up directly beside me, smile maniacally and then start to edge into my lane until I would speed up or slam on the brakes; at which point they would swerve in the opposite direction, throwing up dirt and grass in the median.

I should have known he was insane the moment I saw the Tennessee plates and the "Go Vols!" sticker. If I had to guess, based on driving habits alone, I would believe him to be a Memphis resident. Though, judging on facial expressions and hurled Spanglish insults, he could be from any insane asylum in the U.S. or Mexico.

On the third round of Interstate Tag, I'd decided I'd had enough. I dialed 911 and alerted the area police to a crazed lunatic driver terrorizing the roads at 6 A.M.

All I could think was, "It's too early for this mess. I prefer to limit my police interactions until, at least, noon."


Jason said...

"I should have known he was insane the moment I saw the Tennessee plates and the "Go Vols!" sticker."

LOL That's like spotting a drunk driver. You either speed way up or slow way down.

TC said...

I laughed at the TN plates and Vols sticker too :)

meghansdiscontent said...

Jason - Those TN fans are out of their minds. I've only ever met a few I actually liked . . including the two that SOMEHOW got hold of AR season tickets and invaded my presence at the AR-TN game last year. Thankfully, we whipped them soundly . . but I was almost (notice I said almost) sad about it because that little couple next to me was so darn cute!!

Do you call the police on drunk drivers like I do???

TC - I'm glad that you guys get my humor in this! :) TN fans . . wow-wee. I think the only good thing I can say about them is "Well, at least they're not LS-WHO fans."